I have two biological children and one child that we adopted at birth. We ramped up the doctor visits and therapy, but he was still admitted to the hospital 3 times before he turned 10. They are great parents and had already raised 3, (two of their own and 1 foster kid). Turned out she and her husband had divorced and she had moved to the other state with her son and he had stayed and had the 2 boys. Kids are so easily formed by their environments that adoption can really be a whole second set of challenges for both parent and child. A python was dangling down staring him in the face.

He and another man were walking on a beach and the other guy just got shot through the head from a sniper. TWO DAYS later, he assaulted a 7-year-old in her family's yard. "A woman I worked with had been fostering a 13 year old girl for over 2 years, and had started the adoption process. Your child’s parents love, care for and support your child just as much as you. Greta comes back a year later and basically blackmails neighbor (give her money or she'll steal the baby like neighbor stole Greta). Three days later he went to live with his mother. In a moment of clarity a few months before his passing, he expressed great disappointment in her behaviour to me and while he didn't outright say he regrets adopting her, he made it known that he believed that our family would have been more peaceful without her presence. He'd get angry at girls at school if they refused to be his girlfriend. He does not love anyone or anything. I adopted a teenager 2 years ago. The agency tried to reason with her, she kept the baby a few more days, refusing to use/choose a name and just called her Baby. My regret was almost instant. Therapy, lots of therapy. He was violent and disrespectful towards them, towards teachers, toward fellow students, he couldn’t be controlled. They were told they were getting a newborn, she arrived almost a year old and extremely malnourished and neglected. Adopted children generally come with a great deal of emotional trauma--either from their orphanage or their parental situation, or for whatever reason. The caseworker, specifically, knew ALL of it. I truly hope I don't hear that they have one day released him and he's killed somebody. They sent her back to her foster home after only a few months of her living with them. She was told later that she could have. I Adopted a Child and Have No Regrets Jill Totenberg. Here … They thought since they picked him, they have to stick to that decision until the end. One of my grandmas died of a stroke the same day he went over to torment her. I was also so saddened by this story bc they went into this with pure intentions looking to provide a loving home to children who need one only to have all of that destroyed by lies and. My mum sent him back inside but my sister and I caught him trying to sneak the phone from his room. This girl had a history of trouble with her previous fosters, but had been doing very well with my coworker for the whole time they were fostering her. ,

The adoption fell through and she went back into the foster care system. She adopted a 6 year old girl, Greta, from a foreign country a few years later when neighbor was 50. That freedom to hit the salsa club on a weeknight, those casual text invitations to same-day happy hours. It has been a big challenge. Sad situation all around really.". Which leads me to my third, most horrible adoption story. This had now been the entirety of my adolescence. He did well for several years, but when he turned 9, he began displaying dangerous behaviors. It's the one thing in my life I wish I could undo. He said he would rather have the money that the flight costs than come. She took his money, his house, and alienated every other member of the family from his life. I have had this dog for 5 years and I have grown to regret adopting. There was an investigation and she admitted to lying, but obviously they didn't want to risk having someone who would lie like that in the house. Still, I don’t regret reunion. War is a horrible thing. I got a vasectomy when I was 23. He's helped me through this time. He was with us for three months and we reached breaking point by the second. The older one is not currently in jail but has been in and out for several years now. She already had a 7 year old son who was ecstatic he had a baby sister and he put her to bed every night. When my dad unexpectedly passed away and when it was time for the funeral, we offered to pay for my adopted brother's flight. I started randomly going to the humane society and saw this cute fluffy, pretty big cat. So they didn't worry too much. The adoption fell through and she went back into the foster care system. My anxiety levels are through the roof. , Women Share The Most Obnoxious Things The Men In Their Life Do Regularly, People Share Their Biggest 'Oh, You Weren't Lying' Experiences, People Break Down Their Absolute Best Purchases This Year, Parents Who Adopted A Child And Regretted It Explain What Happened, People Describe The Saddest Truths About Their Life, People Share The Best 'Toddler Complaint' They've Ever Heard, "What's the best toddler complaint you've ever heard? I'm the adoptee. Both my mom and my aunt were adopted. Mae West said that life was a party, only most people didn't know they were invited. A guy in his cabin went to the outhouse and sat down to do his business when he heard something. Both boys were severely malnourished and delayed, both had severe issues stemming from the trauma they endured as 3rd world orphans, and the town my mom was living in at the time was not equipped to handle them. This lead to a lot of attention needed to be directed toward the adoptive brother. Adopting a child is one of the most selfless acts one can ever do. Jill Totenberg owns her own public relations firm and is an adoptive parent. As the sisters grew up into adults, my aunt had very apparent mental health issues that started to show, but again, nothing to make my family regret bringing her in. Then the brothers started trying to abuse the baby so they could never be alone, not even for 5 minutes. I thought about it for a while and did a lot of preparation. Hurting animals, hoarding things in his room, making suicidal and inappropriate comments. That girl had a lot of physical and mental problems. My relationship with my daughter is almost a non-event. She caused them so much stress that it broke their marriage. As all this was going on, they had their own child and the foster child acted up all the time around the baby. His birth relatives end up talking with my friend. Greta ended up running away the first time at 14. Both had good paying, stable jobs, no other kids, and were willing to take on older kids. "I know a family who adopted a kid when he was very young. He proceeded to flip out and threw a plate (plastic, but still). Kids in foster care have been through a lot. He was not more than 6 or 7 at this point. When someone offers to take an unknown child into their house, it's a big commitment. The final straw was when she accused my coworker's husband of assaulting her. He was released at 18. We (the siblings) are all now adults in our 20s-30s. Both babies were born addicted to drugs as a special added touch. I know, I know; we’re in that stage of life. She got remarried when we were in second grade and they adopted another kid a year later, a little girl from China through an agency several parents at our school had used. Parents who adopted a child and then regretted it, what's your story? There probably was a much longer list that I'm not intimately aware of. He thought it was a party. The younger one is currently in jail for robbery. _taboola.push({ Hi! She'd be in tears every night and we were all just breaking apart. ,
He was very entitled and immature. That being said, the second I brought her home I was filled with deep anxiety and regret. Stay Safe! So, they decided to look into adopting some older kids. Bullying was only the start and he quickly grew into a classic example of an abuser. Your every action and inaction influences the child’s future, contributes to their character development. They couldn't agree about what to do with her. They wanted my friend to commit to 5 day a week therapy sessions, and the grandparents were being investigated for their role in the abuse. This broke my mom's heart. Kids are so easily formed by their environments that adoption can really be a whole second set of challenges for both parent and child. My cat died right before christmas at 9 years old. Long story short they were able to disentangle themselves from the situation, just super sad all around. Especially since war can be avoided if humans could just get our act together. They already had 3 other adopted children and 1 that was actually their own. Raising an adopted child is, in some ways, a team effort. My aunt takes full advantage of this situation, and my grandfather, in every way possible - financially, legally, socially, etc. They'd then pass the butt between them to get a tiny puff. He pulled his lighter out and lit it. She was terrified of adults, and because of the malnourishment dealt with a lot of pain getting healthy again. 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed! I mean this kid is getting thrown into a new family and needs time to adjust. Haven’t talked to him in 7 years and don’t ever care to.". Once she was sick, all a sudden she was my daughter and the "peace" of being reunited with her for My sake was very important to her mother. Content has been edited for clarity. So neighbor is now in her 80s, and is raising two kids who have behavioral & emotional issues.". My parents tried for years to have a child of their own and adopted me at 3 months old. Second adoption story, my aunt was 'told by God' that she needed to adopt an orphan from Africa after she sat next to a black child in church one day. When he gets out, somehow the court systems awards custody to his biological mom. Doctors think her biological Mother was probably on substances when she had her. People on Reddit share the reasons why they regret adoption their child. Another family had to send their adopted daughter off for a year of residential treatment. Now I didn't adopt on a whim. Right away there was some behavioral issues, but that is to be expected. My mom gave it everything she got but despite her efforts she was unable to set them on a better path in life. He would threaten to hurt my cat. ", "They Went Into This With Pure Intentions", His Mother Took Them In At Exactly The Wrong Time And Place, The 80s Were The Peak For 90-Day-Fiance's "Big Ed", Joe Exotic's Ex-Husband Claims They Were Never Really Married, Zookeepers Share How Their Animals Are Responding To Lack Of Visitors, For details on Gateway Blend's privacy and cookie policies, please visit our. Louise, their middle child, has severe autism and her mental illness has had significant effects on the entire family's life. My neighbor tried various therapists, doctors, narcotics, everything she could think of. Girl had a history of trouble with her previous fosters, but had been doing very well with them for the whole time they were fostering her. All was fine until at 22, she came down with schizophrenia which was inherited by her father. Legally disowned him at 17 after he stabbed their other kid with a kitchen knife.". The final straw was when she accused my coworker's husband of assaulting her. They are such amazing and cute kitties but having two cats here is very overwhelming for me. She adopted them as a single mother (my father had long passed away) and at the age of 65. This caused them to block off the road and send a helicopter out. *Cough Cough* The way Michael kills the animal and the people in the beginning of the movie and the way they have that kid acting, it is exactly what I fear the kid I know will become. All those child-free years we had together feel forsaken. Although, looks can be deceiving. My aunt DID end up adopting a local baby... and tried to return her a day later because her cried too much. Before you adopt you need to know what to expect. She was spoiled rotten and raised in utmost privilege in a mansion with servants, back when such things were possible. My daughter … When a couple wants to add on to their family, they start thinking about the many ways they can have children. One of those ways is through adoption. He's been gone for a month now, but has left disruptive trails all over. Greta really loved using that as a reason to torture neighbor. She’s 8 years old and affectionate and calm. She told me that had she known then what she knows now that she wouldn't have adopted me and would have had "her own" children instead. So my professor and her husband were stuck with these 2 boys who hated their adoptive family under extremely difficult and stressful circumstances. One died a few months after they left foster care from spinal meningitis. We bought him a bike for Christmas and took it off him for a day when he stayed out past his bedtime. The mother and the son caught the adopted daughter watching him sleep multiple times. The orphanage told them she was healthy and her mom was just too poor to take care of her. I think that man belongs in an isolation ward and not a family home. I can't eat, don't sleep and even forget to shower. One of those ways is through adoption. This boy gave them every issue. They've agreed to love and care for that child through thick and thin. And these are not mean kids; they look scared. My grandma saw it and freaked tf out and the theatre owners gave her a copy of the photo.



He and his buddies devised a tool to reach out through the fence and grab the butts when the guard turned their back. A phone bill $50 over the normal price, writing on the walls, the heavy feeling in my chest that he may come back. My coworker is now considered too old to start a new process, and is sadly without any children. Hopefully the system works in this case.". The best hole-in-the-wall diner in every state. When she had her first child, she didn't take parental leave. At first, this child might seem like the perfect fit for a family. You should be … If I’m being honest, I can’t stand the guy. She got upset at my friend and accused him of abusing her. He is still in prison. Now they’re moving on. I believe that if they do let him out it's just a matter of time. This was mid-80s, back when nobody thought babies need to be picked up and held to ensure correct mental development. She was seeing a therapist regularly and everything was shaping up to be a clean adoption process. We haven't been getting on very well. We have other younger children and his therapist agreed it wasn’t safe. Both babies were born addicted to narcotics as a special added touch. He had a few behavior issues, which we attributed to trauma and sought appropriate help. They cried over him a lot. "I had a professor in college, and she and her husband were having trouble getting pregnant. None of it. None of them wants full custody and their older daughter doesn't want to live with her; she's tired of getting hit for no reason. I hadn’t been forgotten. The no. of Google searches by people who had regrets over getting a dog peaked during the months of July and December. He is a pathological liar and extremely manipulative. I Adopted a Child and Have No Regrets. The foster system knew all of it. ,

Her main excuse was she was trying to get back to the family that neighbor 'stole' her from.